Yesterday I had a weird dream. It all started with a spontaneous idea. Why don’t you take a Japanese class, and wouldn’t it be a great idea to move to Japan for it? The next thing I remember is sitting over my books in a classroom somewhere in Japan. I was studying dilligently for the JLPT2, book after book, conversation after conversation, I came closer to my goal. Then the day has come, and my teacher was handing out the envelopes containing the test-results. Not so in my case, she just put a small slip of paper in front of me, and it read FAILED.
The results weren’t that bad overall, I had a 110 in kanji and grammar, and in 2 other sections, but I totally “failed” the reading passage. My result was 83, which should be a pass, but I still failed?! This hit me big time, my motivation dropped, and I felt down. A whole year of working, all for nothing, all this time invested, and yet such a dissapointing result? Some time later I noticed that my results weren’t bad at all, and my motivation resurfaced, saying to myself: “Hey, you did great, and you are actually in Japan! You couldn’t give more than that, and the results show that you did great after all.” Then my one year stay has come to a close. I was entering my teachers office, thanked her for all her patience and kindness, and I left. The dream ended with another JLPT some months later, and this time I was able to pass, because I studied even harder.
After waking up, I had to think about this dream. Is it a sign of some sort? Am I learning too much? Am I doing too little lately? Was this a much needed wake up call? The N2 is still very far away, so there is no need to worry about it right now. Though I really wish the test was held in my country in July and December, and not only in December as it is right now. I guess that can’t be helped, and I have to live with it.